News Network Becomes Worlds 6th Largest Economy

11 Nov , 2014  

Today, top officials on Wallstreet announced that the website collection known as the Network has become the worlds 6th largest economy. Experts believe that this is due to the super secret “Slingshot” feature of in which they take upwards of $2500 for artists to guarantee that the website will repost an artists song to their network of thousands of followers.

Just a handful of years ago the music blog scene was thriving and artists were quickly being thrown into stardom by getting their songs posted by reputable blogs every week. This thriving scene helped cultivate the birth of the EDM giant and shortly after Dubstep arrived, so then the electronic music blogs started dying. With the help of artists buying their way up the Beatport charts and top 40 radio artists taking over the electronic music scene, music blogs could not compete. Fans got their new music from a top 100 chart on one music store and from the radio.

Things were looking good for the music business again. Money was flowing. Agents could charge 500% over the going market rate just because their artist opened the 3rd stage at EDC. Small parties in every city were dying and artists could finally get the money they deserved by playing corporate sponsored gigs.

The Network come out of the financial boom of the Electronic Dance Music scene. Created at first to promote the dying Dubstep scene, they soon branched out to cover all the brand new genres of music that were popular in local high schools. Taking advantage of the younger white males, aged 14-20, who are all working to become the next ‘big thing’, will “slingshot” their new hit track to the front of their page and to be seen by thousands of fans for a low fee. Parents everywhere are concerned because their credit card debt is only going higher while their children are still living at home in the basement, not applying for college.

“I mowed a lot of lawns this summer to get my track on” Young Alex Mayhal tells us. “I slingshotted my song ‘Big Swaggin’ last march and got my first gig in town because of it. I had never DJed before but I got to open for my favorite local DJ, DJ Party Boy! There was like 30 people there too!” has yet to make a statement about their new status in the world’s financial sector.

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